Scarlet - that does sound pretty horrible!
I can't remember exactly when I first felt Alex move cos I wasn't 100% sure whether it was him or just muscle spasms! .. but it wasn't very early at all - I remember reading in the books that I ought to be feeing him by now and I wasn't :/ made me paranoid! Once he got going, though.. ouch!
That sounds too long to let a baby cry, ZS - are you there in the room with her while she's crying?
I think the 'controlled crying' method is to leave them alone for 5 mins, then go in to calm them.. then leave them for 10 mins, and gradually leave it longer each time before you go in.. and you're meant to try to calm them but don't pick them up!
Thing is, the longer you leave it and then eventually give in, the longer she knows she has to cry before you'll pick her up and let her fall asleep on you.. so she'll keep crying for longer and longer periods each time because she knows you'll eventually give in and pick her up!
Also, being in the room with her will only make her angrier that you're not picking her up.. that's why they say to leave the room.
Also, the puking is dangerous ground.. if you get upset and pick her up as soon as she pukes, she'll think that's the only way to get you to pick her up.. so she may learn to do it on purpose!
I always make sure I treat it very light-heartedly when Alex pukes.. I just smile and say 'oh dear' and clear it up without snatching him up into my arms - otherwise, if I act worried and scared when he pukes, then he'll get really upset and scared about it cos he'll learn that it's a scary, worrying thing (if mummy's scared of it, then it must be bad!) ..or he'll learn to do it on purpose to get me to pick him up!